Many years ago I lost all patience for chasing a tiny ball around an unnecessarily large field. My complete lack of skill and aptitude combined with the sunburn and insect bites finally took its toll. I vowed never to swing a club again. But after taking a few years off, the memories of the pain and suffering faded and I decided to give it another try. I never do anything halfway, so I invested in new clubs, a new bag, and a bunch of accessories that I’ll probably never need. I still suck at golf; that was confirmed today.
Random musings about today’s charity golf scramble:
- Drinking a beer before noon is generally a bad idea.
- I had about three decent shots all day.
- I lost approximately 11 golf balls.
- If there was an official statistic for divot distance, I would hold a record.
- Golf carts should have seatbelts and doors.
- Golf was invented by some drunk guys in Scotland. They would have been proud to see the calamity that ensues when a bunch of drunk golfers decide to play bumper cars with the carts.
- I should really take some lessons.
- I now refer to the 18th hole as The End of Suffering.
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